I wish I was one of those people who just lives to write, who's every fiber of their being is wired to express themselves creatively. Alas, that's just not me. I love to create, and sometimes I feel I'm even kind of good at it. But sometimes, I'm just lazy. Sometimes, I'm too busy being in the moments to write about the moments, for better or for worse.
And so, months pass. The air grows colder, nights grow longer, and many pots of stew and soup are conjured and warmed up and consumed, and some of them are even worthy of writing about, but nothing is written about them.
Hard life experiences come up, the kind that no one or nothing can really prepare you for. You dig in and push forward one moment at a time and one step at a time, even when you can't see the road in front of you, let alone the final destination. You push forward one moment at a time, one prayer at a time, one miracle at a time. Sometimes you feel like you're pushing forward one battle at a time and one heart wrenching sacrifice at a time. But you try to focus more on the moments that feel miraculous, because those are the only moments that can carry you through to wherever that final destination is supposed to be. You try to keep your eyes on the road, even when you can't see the road.
And then, a white Christmas happens, even if it happens a day or two late. No one seems to mind because you are all just happy and thankful to have this time to be together, snow or no snow.
Pizzelles get baked, all three Godfather movies get watched, the wine and beer are flowing and diets get planned. And before you know it, you're slip sliding into a new year and nearly a new decade (for the new decade really begins in 2011, right?).
That about sums up these last months for me. One moment it was the end of the summer, the next it was Halloween and suddenly and startlingly, the new year is close enough to touch. But I must say I'm looking forward to whatever said new year may hold, ready to let go of this last year and all that it has held, for better or for worse.
So happy new year to you and yours from me and mine, and here's wishing all of us a fruitful and delicious and healthy and inspiring 2010 and beyond.
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